Blacklist

I started up the engine and headed for the place we met
I prayed to sister Juliette, smoked three packs of cigarettes
I'm still trying to figure out forgiveness
And keep track of all of my sins
Just tell me you don't love me, and I promise I won't
Darken your doorstep again

This sure ain't how I thought that it would feel to finally have made it
I've arrived alive in Danbury, damn it's overrated
They put us back on the blacklist
Well we never learned why we needed saved
We took a ride trying to hide from the God
Of early marriages and empty graves

Last night, New York City was heaven, now I'm feeling low
And how many stones did we roll, hoping hell would explode
We read all the right books, we sang songs we misunderstood
And with or without any reason, we did rebellion what justice we could

So I'm trying not to think about home, and all that I miss
I swallowed my pride, and I cried, cause we didn't exist
You said it's now or never, well I never stop feeling that way
We get turned around, our spirits break down, we just lie and say we're ok

Well the older I get, truth gets harder to find
And famous false prophets get by off of robbing good men blind
Maybe I don't have it in me, maybe it doesn't have me in it
And if I don't fly, that's fine, just let me find the place where I fit